Terrence Kennedy
Love is the best feeling until a breakup happens of course. You were feeling your best until the absolute worst happened. Learning to find happiness without your long-term girlfriend can be frustrating.
In fact, how be single again is one of life’s biggest challenges now… after all, you feel horrible about the black holes in your relationship history.
If you talk about the dos and don'ts of how to be single again, you have to understand that the transition process can be pretty awesome too.
But before we talk about handling a breakup, let’s discuss whether or not you can actually see it coming.
How to be Single Again: What to do after breaking up with your long term girlfriend?
It’s Over: What Did She Mean By That?
Every couple has fights but there’s a huge difference between a fight and a blowout that’s about to send you to Singles Valley. How do you figure out when your partner is about to call it quits?
Well, you need to take a long hard look at your future dating prospects with a new girlfriend when you start having heated discussions about driving or wardrobe malfunction.
Often fights are not even about something that actually impacts you. It can be part of some overheard gossip or you both might be saying the same thing without sending a clear message across.
Simply put, no two breakups are the same, but fights that end up long-term relationships are exactly similar. Right before long-term couples call it quits, they have silly arguments about placing priority on sex.
If your girlfriend is complaining about how the erotic connection has evaporated and why the lack of contact is no longer acceptable, you are heading towards Single Valley again.
It is also seen that fading positive memories and dredging up negative memories are classic signs of a breakup storm. If your partner can’t see anything in positive perspective, you have to start working on how to be single again.
Whether it’s about your new friend or taking your mom’s side over ‘mine’ arguments, that’s the time when you should be ready for a big relationship blow up.
The “I have to do everything” fight can hurt your relationship more than you realize. American Psychological Association Study reveals that couples who divide chores have higher relationship satisfaction than partners who don’t work together.
Five Very Common Reasons Long-term Couples Decide to Breakup
You now have an idea why your long-term relationship fizzled instead of sizzled. So here’s a list of super common reasons long-term partners decide to end their relationships. Some of you might relate closely to one than more reason!
These are:
1. Not enough sex
- sex is important for relationship and that’s end of conversation. If you’re bedroom stuff isn’t going on smoothly, get ready to pack your bags.
2. Money problems.
- It could be as simple as spending more money at a coffee shop or you could just have different point of views about savings. If you can’t agree on money matters, you are less likely to agree on anything else for that matter.
3. Bad communication.
- Long term relationships require lots of important talking and if either or both of you don’t communicate, this relationship is surely going to crumble.
4. Not compromising.
- Communication makes no difference if there’s no willingness to compromise.
5. Cheating and Infidelity
- Interestingly exact figures about cheating are nearly impossible to establish but experts believe that it is becoming more common among people under 30. This increase is also contributed to having greater ‘away time.’
Single Again – How You Should NOT Handle Breakups
Okay you just got dumped or maybe you broke up with someone but it doesn’t really matter. Grieving over your lost relationship for a short time is understandable but the last thing you should do is grief over your ex for too long.
Every day is a new day but eventually you have to get over it. You will be surprised to know that romantic relationship breakups can cause real pain. Researchers at University of California suggest that losing a partner causes pain just like a real injury.
Check out this video:
If you’ve been broken up with your long-term girlfriend, here are the 5 Most Important Things you should Avoid Doing at All Costs:
1. Keeping contact.
- Yes, stop wanting them to call you and don’t look through old photographs or Facebook memories. Trying to keep contact with your ex is like severing your wound over and over again.
2. Trying to keep a friendship.
- This perhaps is the silliest mistake. Being friends with your ex doesn’t allow you the ‘alone time and space’ that you need to heal.
3. You wait for apology from your ex.
- The simple fact is that you don’t need their approval or apology to move on with your life. Simply understand that your relationship didn’t work out and this is enough for you to move on with your life.
4. Regret and pitiful begging.
- You just cannot force someone to have you back. In fact, that’s a decision that they have to make on their own. Moreover, you shouldn’t lose your respect for someone who feels you weren’t good enough.
5. Sinking into Serious Depression.
- Don’t remain trapped in your home or isolate yourself from family and friends. Right now, you should focus on caring more about yourself than anything else. Start new hobbies, talk to your friends – you can do anything that makes you feel good.
How to be Single Again – The Wholistic Way
Paying attention to the following core areas of your life can help you get on the road to recovery from that break up fast.
Check out this video of How you can make your ex miss you on a Psycho-therapist's point of view:
Physical Wellbeing
The most confident singles are ones who work on their mind and body.
1. Don’t medicate
- Avoid drinking and consuming too much caffeine or sugary foods. This way you’ll only end up feeling worse about yourself. Try to practice meditation and yoga to clear your mind and calm down your thoughts.
2. Eat healthy meals
Wholesome meals that are balanced and freshly made can maintain your body and mind in good shape. More importantly, a balanced diet is less likely to cause you to fall into deep depression, gain weight or experience sleep disturbances.
3. Sleep
- There’s nothing more soothing to your body and brain than quality sleep. Imagine all negative feeling flowing out of you as you rest on your bed every night.
4. Get moving
Physical exercise increases endorphins – brain chemicals that make you happy. You can dance, do some yoga moves or perform any kind of physical activity for 20 to 30 minutes a day to be active.
Emotional Health
1. it’s totally possible to create an amazing life that doesn’t always include a girlfriend. Dream big and feel your emotions. Remember, the best way to unload your feelings is to write them down instead of saying out loud to others. You can even start a dialogue with your broken heart to lift your mood instantly.
2. Surrounding yourself with positive people can uplift your mood and you will be able to return to life quickly.
3. Practice breathing exercises to boost the healing process and lessen anxiety. Take a deep breath and say out loud that “I can handle this.”
Moving On
Taking out some time to figure out how to be single again is a smart thing to do. Don’t let one heartbreak determine the course of your life. Instead gain something wonderful by trying again.