Mark Greene Successful Open Relationships
The world is changing fast, and with it, so is our conception of what a relationship has to look like. Polyamory has grown as a movement with people choosing to love multiple people at once, instead of expecting one person to satisfy all of their relationship needs. This article isn’t going to wax philosophical about the merits of an open relationship over a closed one, but instead, explore what makes certain open relationships have a way better chance at longevity. An open relationship needs certain things to work from everyone involved. If your open relationship is just a free pass for behavior you wouldn’t normally put up with, that’s less of polyamory and more of taking advantage of someone’s feelings.
Without further delay, here’s what makes an open relationship last:
Handling jealousy in a mature manner
Open relationships and the people in them aren’t free from normal human emotions like jealousy. It can be easy to think that you’re not being chosen in favor of someone else, or as if certain parts of you aren’t up to snuff so they seek them out elsewhere. Any time jealousy is felt, it should be communicated openly and honestly without any accusatory remarks. This way, you and your partner(s) can better understand each other and hopefully grow closer because of it. Jealousy left on its own will stew and grow into something negative. Successful open relationships deal with jealousy before it hits that point.
Establishing ground rules
The level of “openness” in any given open relationship can vary. For some, it can be as simple as allowing yourself to get hit on at a bar, while for others, it’s almost like having several distinct relationships all at the same time. It’s important to communicate what you’ll put up with and what you won’t ahead of time. Making open relationship rules before you get your heart stepped on is a prudent choice and absolutely necessary. These types of relationships are unorthodox. There isn’t a lot of places someone can go to help understand their specific situation. That’s why getting as much understanding as you can from within the relationship is 100% essential.
Understanding the emotions behind actions
Since these types of relationships are more challenging to maneuver mentally, how we express those thoughts might not always match up exactly to how we see them within ourselves. If your partner is angry at you or brings up certain topics constantly asking you to change, you should try to understand where they’re coming from and why those things matter to them. If they’re constantly mentioning what you’re up to with someone else, they might feel as if they are being cast aside, or like you’re putting effort into aspects of the other relationship that you aren’t in the one you share with that person. Human beings are complex. Don’t take everything at face value.
Conclusion
These three tips make the foundation of any successful open relationship. These types of relationships need to have a certain level of emotional maturity to properly blossom into something everybody can be happy with. Without understanding and communication, there can be no proper love or trust in an open relationship.
