Pleasing your partner is a delicate business, and there’s no shame in looking around for some external tips on how to improve your game. Remember that sex is a two way street, or a three way street if that’s your fancy; so it’s important to keep in mind what she’s thinking, feeling and wanting throughout.
Obviously, this is just generally the well conscientious thing to do, for her sake, but it will also improve your own sexual gratification tenfold. Satisfying a woman in bed is a reciprocal experience, if you put in the leg work, you can be damn sure she’ll feel it and do the same for you.
How to Satisfy a Woman in Bed
Rectify Your Errors
The first step towards completely satisfying any woman in bed, is to sort out all of the problems and bad habits you’ve let take over, through the years (or, any habits you’re likely to form).
Many articles and discussions centred round pleasing a woman sexually often seem to target the man as the inadequate one. There are major mistakes with this generalisation, which will be covered later, but that doesn’t change the fact that it is often true. Below are some predominant complaints from sexually dissatisfied women… Are you guilty of some of them?
He never kisses me when we’re making love
It’s been proven time and again that kissing has a strong mentally stimulating effect (it’s even noted to lower cortisol, which causes stress – although the act of sex itself should be stress relieving enough).
Kissing is your first step to orgasm. Kissing her throughout the ‘action’ will give some intimacy back to the experience, and add to her overall pleasure. Don’t just abandon it after foreplay (Medill.edu)!
He never goes down on me (oral sex)
Does this one really need explaining? We all know how great oral stimulation can be, for both sexes, and she wants it just as much as we do. So get your act together and surprise her now and again – it’s only fair. Besides, it’ll most likely encourage her to return the favour!
Check out this video:
He forgets about the breasts when we’re past foreplay
This is much more common than you’d expect, and it’s particularly strange when you regard how often a woman’s breasts are made the focal point of a man’s desires and her outward aesthetic.
It has been proven, in studies, that stimulation of a woman’s nipples can trigger many of the same sensations and impulses as giving her genitals attention. So stop ignoring those breasts, fellas!
But it’s not all your fault…
This isn’t to say that everything is down to you. Just like any enjoyable, safe and exciting sexual experience, communication is the key – for you to truly understand what your lady wants from you, she has to tell you.
It might not seem particularly romantic or sexy, to ask her outright what she wants you to do, but it will make everything much easier and much more enjoyable for both of you.
More often than not, though, it’s the unspoken action which gets the best results. The unpredictable nature of a sudden new move or style can be exhilarating in itself, for her, so don’t be afraid to try out some of these things, next time you get her into bed:
Never, ever, ever forget about the G-spot!
The fabled G-spot is the nightmare of many men, and the deep, carnal dream of many women. It really is the key to completely satisfying a woman.
Every woman is slightly different, but generally speaking, the legendary G-spot isn’t particularly difficult to find (about two inches into the vagina, along the front wall) – hit this, and she’ll be seeing fireworks in no time.
This goes for the clitoris too; never neglect this all important key player. Stimulating her clitoris before and throughout can completely blow her away; start gentle and slow, then increase the speed or force gradually. Use her breathing as a guide, you’ll know when you’re doing it right (Cosmopolitan.com).
Tease or pull her hair throughout
The scalp is chock full of nerves, which become even more sensitive when she is aroused (the same goes for you, by the way), so by teasing and pulling a little in the heat of the moment, you’ll be adding to the overall cocktail of tingles she’ll already be feeling (SexWithinMarriage.com).
This hair pulling act is actually part and parcel of something larger – many women, in a few online studies, have suggested that they desire a little more aggression in their sex lives.
This is an easy fact to misconstrue, of course. It doesn’t immediately mean anything violent, or really hard core (although, some women do find this pleasurable – again communication is key), but things such as hair pulling, spanking, dirty talk or simply being more assertive during sex.
This goes both ways, too. Often the women want to be the aggressor (Cosmopolitan.com).
Consider adopting a bit of role-play
You might not want to admit it, least of all to your intimate partner, but we all have sexual fantasies – some of which are simply ridiculous, or completely fantastical. Your woman does, just as much as you do, so bite the bullet and ask about putting some role-play into your sex lives.
This can easily go two ways: either she’ll get off on dressing up for you, and fulfilling some long standing fantasy of yours, or she’ll want you to dress up for her. Who are you to say no to that?
The simplest route to satisfying her?
Never underestimate the power of the quickie. It might seem like most women would turn their nose up at the idea of a quick run without any of the intimate building up, but that’s a popular misconception.
Sometimes an out-of-nowhere advance can make the whole thing that much sexier and exciting, by making it seem like you just can’t keep yourself away from her.
That’s it, men. Take on board some of the information above, and pick and choose where, when and what you want to try out the next time you take a woman to bed. But remember, all of the fun is in experimenting for yourself (and her)!